Modesty and Estimation: Philosocom's Directory On Ego Management
Updated: Nov 7
(The Directory:
“The first half of life is devoted to forming a healthy ego, the second half is going inward and letting go of it.” -- Carl Jung
I've often pondered the relationship between modesty and personal excellence. My experience suggests that a certain level of self-confidence is essential for individuals who possess exceptional abilities. Yet, the expectation of humility can sometimes hinder our recognition of our own potential.
The concern of appearing arrogant has, at times, held me back. Despite my own dislike of arrogance, I've been accused of it due to my direct and often very logic-based communication style. It appeared to many as hostile, yet that is how logic is. Robotic. Emotionless. Ruthless. Ruthless not only towards others but also towards myself.
It's been frustrating to be misjudged, especially by those who've known me for a long time. It is carried by strange feelings of guilt and shame.
After returning to my darker past, I used that darkness to transform myself into the best version of myself, like the anti-villain Heihachi Mishima. I have grown much mentally over a shorter lifespan overall. Like a computer, I update myself independently using my own philosophical inquiry.
Slowly but surely I find myself isolated from many people due to my rapid, several transformations. Slowly, my mentality requires people to not only think but act like geniuses, in order to understand me.
My ascetic transformations appear unreal to the vast majority of people... as I slowly and gradually found myself liberated from my own cane. My own medication. My own depression. People are not used to people like me who focus on revolutionizing themselves. People are not used to others who seek to rectify this world one step at a time... My understanding is updated by my own hands, and their understanding stagnates itself to the conventionality of their orthodox understanding.
With their stagnant understanding, they are surprised each time. Failing to consider the bigger picture as others fail doing it as well. It is lonely at the top for any master. That includes sages such as myself.
You merely think the last paragraph is depressing because your habit is to judge the present based on past events. Unwilling to learn, the understanding of many people will remain stagnant, and even deteriorate, in an ever-changing world of instability, protests and demonstrations, and the naturality of trauma.
Epictetus' reminder that some things in life are beyond our control, including the choice of external perception, has been particularly insightful. While I can influence my actions, I can't control how others perceive me.
I can't force people to think of me in a certain way, and my social challenges, stemming from autism, make this even more difficult. However, I prefer not making excuses, and not whining. I prefer to work on myself, for life... life is a task. A series of tasks.
I refuse blinding myself because of my many strange accomplishments. Blinding myself would only prevent further growth into the continuing, never-ending journey to greatness. I prefer to learn from everything and everyone. To be done with it. To rest, and to press forward after respite.
Possessing exceptional skills in a particular field doesn't inherently make one superior to others. Superiority and inferiority are context based. You identify the context, you act accordingly. That's it. Like a gun, ego is a tool. Hit your target, not your foot.
A philosopher's legitimacy is earned through consistent engagement with their subject matter, not solely through formal credentials. Even a child could be a philosopher if they possess the intellectual capacity and inclination.
The realization that even the most accomplished individuals are vulnerable to criticism has helped me persevere. I've faced my share of negative feedback as a writer, but it hasn't deterred me. Negative. I refuse to relent. I prefer to construct my intellect not just from constructive criticism, but from anything I receive. Anything.
I estimate myself according to where I'm at, to when I'm at, and then I try to decide correctly to the context. Then, I use the context to help me. Then, I leave the context to another context. Finally, I learn from any context, I grow, I reduce mistakes, I rectify mistakes. That is all.
If we believe in our abilities, we shouldn't be afraid to express that belief. However, it is not a matter of fear but of making the right decision per your goals each time. Of course living is tiring as a result. Philosophy is inevitable, however, in strategy and in planning.
The field of philosophy, particularly in the 21st century, can be challenging due to its accessibility. Anyone can theoretically become a philosopher, which can lead to skepticism and criticism. To establish credibility, philosophers must consistently engage with their subject matter and contribute meaningful insights. They must demonstrate their worth. They must relentlessly press forward to reveal to this world the true relevance of philosophy.
A philosopher is essentially a deep thinker who contemplates life on a regular basis. This intellectual pursuit should be respected, regardless of one's personal opinions. However, for justice to be served, justice is to be worked for.
We should see our importance after we succeed more and more. Not before we've accomplished our goals.
The only place where success comes before work is in the dictionary. -- Vidal Sassoon
For those who may have negative opinions about my work, I encourage them to seek out content that aligns with their preferences. Reduce your stress, and employ your intuition to explore my vast empire of articles, until you find the the articles that resonate with your inner being. With your inner truth. With your heart.
Use your heart to help yourself with your problems. That is more important than my accomplishments.
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